In the Cuban Streets - October 2018 |
To be honest, 2018 was an amazing year for me. I started the organization: BiblesPlusBrunch, to encourage and equip women to live intentional and purposeful lives. I traveled to 6 countries, and got engaged to the man of my prayers. I saw my friends get into grad school, start careers and organizations, get into relationships with amazing men and even get engaged!
But as amazing as 2018 was, I also learned so many though
lessons, questioned the spirit of God, battled crippling doubt and unbelief,
struggled financially, spiritually, emotionally and relationally and considered
50 million ways to quit it all(life included).
Yes, all of this, same year.
And if you're human, I’m sure you can relate to the bittersweet year that was 2018.
Do I believe 2019 will be any different? Absolutely.
But not because life won’t have its ups and downs, but
because each year I exist is a confirmation that God’s plan for my life is
still in full effect and I can trust him to bring it to completion.
In the meantime, I took the liberty of writing the 3 biggest lessons I learned in 2018.
The absence of God’s
voice does not mean the absence of God’s presence.
I struggled to hear the voice of God in 2018. I mean I
really struggled. And it always felt like when I needed Him most was when He
was the most silent and unwilling to speak.
I remember right before the second Biblesplusbrunch event, I
was desperately searching for an internship after being fired from my pervious
one (long story). My bank account was dwindling, my relationship was rocky and
God was unbelievably silent.
Yet he spoke enough to tell me to host another brunch. Where
was the money going to come from Lord? Who were the women who would show up?
How was this whole thing supposed to even happen?
On the Wednesday night before the brunch I was still trying
to put together the pieces, wondering how I would fund this event and pay rent.
So what did I do during worship at church? I cried, I sobbed so desperately
that I’m sure heaven was shook. I could do nothing else but weep because my God
refused to hear my prayers, or so I thought.
But yet he was there. Miracles of miracles, my mother
blessed me with some money, an amount I hadn’t even asked for, more than I
could have imagined, but so timely.
So there was God, silent through the struggle, but never absent
and always on time with the miracle.
Doubt exists to be
overcome by Faith. It is the one battle you’re equipped to always win.
I don’t have a long, beautiful anecdotal story to illustrate
this lesson. My entire 2018 was filled with doubt. I doubted my abilities, my
discernment, my worthiness, my future. You name it, I questioned it.
And I’d love to say I’ve overcome doubt, but that would be a
lie. It creeps in still, especially when I feel deficient, when God seems
silent or when the task seems monumental.
The rainbow in the storm? Everytime my doubt has emerged,
God’s grace has been sufficient and He' given me the measure of faith I need
to overcome every obstacle. So as long as God is still God, I will always win
the battle against doubt, and for that I’m grateful.
You have plans, but
God’s plans are always better.
In my internship struggles, I went from I want to make XX an
hour to I’ll take $8.56 Lord, just give me a job. I went from I want to work part
time to I’ll work any shift except Sunday.
I was willing to settle because my plans changed as my
circumstances did. But God’s plan are consistent. So when I was ready to
settle, He never did.
I ended getting hired in my current position, and I honestly feel underqualified. I’m grateful for God’s faithfulness, and I’m glad my
plans didn’t work out.
For some of you, 2018 was the hell year, and for others, a season
of manifestation. I pray that in 2019, you remember the lessons that God taught
you, you grow better, not bitter and you advance towards His plans for your
life.
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Remember that the fact that you’re still here means God’s
not done with you yet.
All my love,
Obioma
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Announcements
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